The Supposed Definition of Destiny
by crazy-about-books
Summary: Merlin has followed his destiny-often unwittingly-ever since he arrived in Camelot. However, he never truly understood what it meant; never new what it was for them to be two sides of one coin. That is, he didn't know until his destiny was destroyed.
1. Merlin

**A/N:** **Hello! I am new to this fandom, I have been reading for roughly two weeks and boy, is it a pleasure. A short story of my naivety of this fandom: I was searching for a story to read here and I kept coming across 'arwen' in the summaries. "What in the world," I kept thinking' "Is a LotR character doing here?" Then it struck me... it's a pairing. I can tell you I did not feel very smart. **

**Aside from that, as this is my first _Merlin_ story I would greatly appreciate feedback. Now, I know this is not allot to go on and is very AU, so I understand. However I am already writing another and we shall see how soon I get it her.  
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**Disclaimer: I do not own Merlin, if I did there would be shameless amounts of not-so-hidden references to my other favorite stories and tales. So...no...I wish I did if that's any consolation.  
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**On to the super short story...  
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The Supposed Definition of Destiny

It had been said before. Several times in fact. It was a mantra that kept repeating itself over and over and over–no matter how _tiring_ it got. He just wants it to stop. He wants to pretend he never heard those words; pretend that he didn't know how closely their lives were entwined. Perhaps it wouldn't hurt so much then.

He heard it the first time he arrived, actually.

_They were one. Each a side of the same coin._

But what if one side gets damaged? Then the other does as well, even if you can't see it, because they are the same–not separate. And what if the one side is destroyed–utterly and irrevocably destroyed? What then? Then, there is nothing to be done. No matter how hard people try, the coin can never be repaired. Even if that once bright coin is sliced cleanly down the middle nothing can be done. Yes, it might maintain the same shape. Yes, there continues to be two sides, but it is not the same.

That damage can never be repaired. The side that remains can never forget. It will fall through life, traveling endlessly. All matter of forces wear at the lonely half. Rough and smooth hands. Winds and storms. Rocks and sand. All tear at the coin, while it waits for the day, forever into the unending future, when it will finally fall apart.

At that point the coin will be free to forget or to fall into the nothing that took its other side long ago.

These thoughts tear at him as he deals with the knowledge that he has lost _his_ other half. He watches, jealously and selfishly, as the others slowly–oh so slowly– move on . He watches jealously because he knows that he can never forget; and selfishly because he doesn't want to forget and doesn't think that the others have a right to.

No, nothing will ever become right again. He vows to suffer in silence as he waits for his destiny that he knows was destroyed the moment that his friend was dealt that mortal blow. He watches as magic is hunted, but at the same time becomes increasingly common. Despite the numbers of sorcerers having increased, he feels that magic is dying. He sees that this increase in numbers is a last defense of the Old Religion. Not only had his future, his destiny, and his friend's life been destroyed. Magic was also ruined at that moment.

For years, for forever and a day, those words will haunt him. They will become unceasing, ghostly whispers. A cruel reminder of what could have been. They will never let him forget.

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**So...tell me what you think...*wrings hands with a nervous/eager grin*...You know, I've noticed that this fandom seems _allot_ nicer than the HP one in the reviews area-if you know what I mean /hint hint/ Any-whose... not too pleased with it but...yeah just tell me what you think if you can. **


	2. Arthur

**Guess what, people! I decided to continue this little story. I was just sitting at my little computer and started to write a little one-shot from Arthur's little point of view. So, my plan is to write little thoughts from several characters POVs. If you have requests just mention it in a review and I'll see what I can do. Thanks to all of those who reviewed my previous chapter, I really appreciate it.**

~Arthur~

Destinies are troublesome things.  
You feel trapped.  
Like your whole life has been planned out for you  
and you've got no control  
over anything and sometimes  
you don't even know if what destiny has decided  
is really the best thing at all.

Ironically enough some of the best words of advice that he has ever heard came from an idiot. An idiot who has stuck by him for years on end and seems to have an endless supply of optimism. Occasionally this idiot spews out words of such wisdom that Arthur is almost convinced to denounce his manservant's title of idiot and call him a friend. Nonetheless Merlin maintains the (affectionate) title of 'idiot' and plays the part splendidly. To be perfectly honest, the Prince finds this to be a sort of comfort. Everything has proven subject to change these last few years and everything seems to have the tendency to turn on its head at the slightest provocation. His ideals change, people show new light, and his heart seems to deny everything that he has been taught.

It is hard.

He is afraid of being a disappointment - a failure.

Despite all the mistakes he has made Merlin seems to hold the belief that these 'trials' have made him strong. This thought creates a cacophony of reactions. A part of him shies away from the solid iron belief that he will be the greatest king Camelot has known. Another wants to laugh at the Merlin's naivety. Then there is a part that is immensely grateful towards the idiot his friend who stills has faith in his master. Though those words directly influenced his decision to not marry Elena - she truly was a lovely girl, but he did not love her - and follow his heart and remain true to the girl he did love.

Those words follow him.

There are times where he is standing, contemplating and that memory comes. Sometimes it comes crashing like Gwaine walking through the corridors as a bumbling drunk, other times it slithers in as a shiver up his spine as he wonders 'Is this really the right decision?' Most of the time however he doesn't notice that Merlin influence's his choices. It is only years later that he will be able to see with clarity the effect that Merlin has had. But for now he is only grateful the Merlin-with all his talk of destiny, greatness and stupidity-is an unchanging factor in his life.


End file.
